I love my mom. As a child she did a great job at keeping me in line, while letting me get away with murder sometimes.

She was there for almost all my little league games. She attended the swim meets in high school where the humidity in the indoor pool was so thick you could taste the chlorine in the air. She also attended my high school volleyball games, even though she wasn’t  that interested. These days she’s just driving the nurse in me NUTS!

I’m a registered nurse and a certified athletic trainer. So unfortunately I do know a thing or two about healthy living and the consequences of not living healthy! I’ve seen it from both sides of the coin.

My mother is not the healthiest person around. OK, let me rephrase that. My mom is not a healthy person who is in the biggest state of DENIAL.

She’s reaching 60 years of age. She is a transcriptionist for a local doctors office (Isn’t that Karma). She smokes. Not only does she smoke, but smokes A LOT. The last time I inquired about her habit, she was puttin’  away 2packs a day I think?

She also drinks coffee all day at work and then drinks hot tea at home. She orders take out food for her and my Dad’s dinner at least twice a week or more.

So let’s see. She’s about as sedentary as can be. Smokes cigarettes, drinks an abusive amount of caffeine, and probably consumes more trans fats in one week than you or I do in a couple months.

OH. Did I mention that BOTH her parents died at an early age from CANCER!!!!!!!!

Are you getting the picture here? I don’t think you have to have any medical training to understand how unhealthy her lifestyle is.

So every time I see her, I’m the one who plays the mean and nasty son who has to get on his healthy soap box and explain to my mother what she’s doing is expediting her travel time to the grave.

Lately she tells me she can’t lay totally flat because it’s too hard to breathe. So now she sleeps in a sitting position! Have you ever heard of COPD?How about CHF?

So I visited my mother today and I’m always frank with her. Hell I’m blatantly rude and brutally honest. “ Mom, do you realize we’re all going to watch you die in the hospital on a breathing machine?”

She seems to have an answer and/or excuse for everything that she does or does not do.

-I’m too old now

-My back hurts

-I have arthritis

The list is endless.

“Who do you think is going to be the decision maker when it comes to your end of life care? I know you don’t think your weak-stomached daughter will!” “Dad has already given me the explicit rights to his end of life care”

I know it’s not the most ‘caring’ or ‘compassionate’ way of talking to a loved one. But my mother is an old dog who won’t learn any new tricks, and I’m at my wits end. I really would like to see her change. Even a small change. A small change will extend her life by years if she would just try.

I love my mom and I’d like to see her stick around for a while.

How would you handle this brick wall?

Carpe Diem

Tags: brick wall, health, health, mom