Nov
8

Up and Down..

Tired_by_billysphoto  Image Source:deviantART

For the count that is. Have I mentioned how much the night shift and I do not get along? (You’re probably getting sick and ‘tired’ of hearing it from me)

Here’s my problem. I’m a light sleeper. So light of a sleeper that the wind outside wakes me- not a lie. So ‘forcing’ myself or convincing myself to sleep is just impossible.

I’m all out of sorts.

My body is rejecting my F’d up circadian clock right now. It doesn’t know if it’s coming or going. Day or night? Stay awake.. or sleep?

When I want or need to sleep.. I’m wide fricken awake!. When I want or need to stay awake.. I’m peeling my eyelids open just to focus! I have to convince my synapses they need to fire.

My mind’s not right. My brain is hazy. And my attitude has gone down the toilet. My poor wife has suffered the most. She gets to listen to me whine.. and she gets the whipping end of my short-fuse. I seem to be snapping and ‘biting’ at all the small things – and I KNOW I’m doing it. She’s so good to me, tolerating me and my down-right miserable-ness. These are one of the million times I am truly lucky to be her husband. She makes me a better man by simply being her – because no one else would tolerate me and my bitterness. I love you angel.

Grr.

I hate this.

I hate the ‘me’ I see.

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Posted by Sean health, nurse, rambling Subscribe to RSS feed
  • frogeyes10
    You ARE the light of my life and I know you would do the same for me! I love you baby..xoxo
  • XOXO
  • Eye shades, ear plugs, chemical sedative of choice, rinse and repeat. Has worked for me for about 3 months. Prior to that I had no issues, but something about this summer kept me awake. Now that Fall is back I have no issues, except waking up confused on my day off, but that is a whole other ball game.
  • I've tried all the above and more - trust me. The nigh shift is not what it used to be for me. I just can't do this the way I used to. I'm just not made for it.
  • pinkyrn
    Night shift sucks. How long do you have to do it? How long have you done it? I used to do three night shifts of 12 hour duration. Living hell but the money was good and I had a kid in college. The older I get the harder it is to do 12 hours and night shifts. I avoid them like the plague. Although the plague is easier to avoid than night shift if you are a nurse.
  • It's a 2 week rotation. So I don't have an option right now. *sigh*. Thanks
  • Sean, are you straight nights, or day/nights? I think the day night rotation kicks the crap out of you. I refuse to do it. I'm lucky that I am at a point in my life where both my kids are adults now, and I work straight PM's.

    I remember years ago when I worked mostly nights and switched to a new job where I did not work as many graveyard shifts, it is amazing how many people came up to me and said 'wow! you seem like you are in a much better mood!'. I did not even realize what a prick I was because of the sleep deprivation-and when you work nights, you ARE sleep deprived.

    The one thing that I liked when I did straight nights, was that at least I was able to get into a rythym -much more than day/nights. The other thing about nights that I liked was the other night nurses. It seems to me that most nurses who work nights are a much more laid back group, and have better team work skills-because there are less of us to help, I think people feel more accountable.

    Not having all of the management people around on nights was a benefit, too.

    That said-I am not in any hurry to go back to nights any time soon.

    Oh yeah, there is also that little matter of of marital relations with one's spouse. Tough to put a price tag on that, even with shift differential.
  • Steve Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment - from one male nurse to another!
    I agree on all points. I WAS on the flip schedule, but I've hopefully improved my situation recently with no more nights. Each to his own with the preference. I love days. And the staff is really dependent upon the facility. I've worked with some good and some really bad night shift coworkers! LOL
    Yes, you can't say enough about the stress nights puts on one's marriage. Nuff said.
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